Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
