The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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