don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize