Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
