porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
People in love make me want to vomit
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
