it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
tonight lets celebrate not being married
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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