hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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