even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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