So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Sext me about skeletons
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
