Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
