Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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