does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
