oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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