My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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