is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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