I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
