Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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