I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Randomize