I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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