this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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