how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
