Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
