I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
