Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
