i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
