I hate all girls vehemently.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
