I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
