Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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