If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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