we're blogging at a bar
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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