Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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