Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I don't think brook has ever known best
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize