what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
