Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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