All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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