I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
