I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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