I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
