I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
