we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
