Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
