So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
