If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
