Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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