Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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