sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
