Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
