is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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