I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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