I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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