there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
